Being that I have a severe interest in modern geology, as well as historical geology, I’ve always been curious about these “great flood” rumors and how I could prove them wrong. Over time, it’s easy to nitpick at the majority of their talking points, but there are some details that many people might not know in favor of science.
Let’s start with the actual evidence in favor of a global flood. Yup, I said it. There was indeed a global flood at one point in Earth’s history. However, it was a few billion years ago and not at 2348 BC: an exact creationist date. All of the water on Earth was brought to us by extraterrestrial sources. According to NASA, most of the water seems to have come from the asteroid belt: an orbit of billions and billions of asteroids and meteors that are farther away from the Sun than the Earth. This enables them to maintain the water content more easily since Earth would have been a bit too close to the Sun at the time to maintain small amounts on its own. Over time, more and more meteors crashed into our planet, creating a global ocean and clearing the path for our atmosphere’s birth. This theory is corroborated with the recent findings of water on our Moon.
Okay, so now that we have that out of the way we can get to the fun stuff! Assuming that the supposed flood was only a few thousand years ago, we can be fairly sure that the topography of the Earth was relatively close to how we see it today. Nearly everything we see: volcanoes, mountains, oceans, rivers, lakes, deserts, etc. would have been nearly exactly the same, with a slight possibility for minor changes. And, yes, the Grand Canyon would have already been “carved.”
Flood Argument #1: The Fossil Record (billions of dead things buried in sedimentation all over the Earth)
So, we’ve found fossils inside sediments all across the planet. So? Who says they were laid down at the exact same time? Consider continental drift (or plate tectonics) – over millions and millions of years, the continents have been moving and shifting all over the Earth’s surface. It’s highly probable that every area has been covered by an ocean at one time or another. Not only that, but fossils don’t necessarily need to die and fall into an ocean to be preserved…
Then there’s the garbage attempt at an argument about fossils being at the tops of mountains. So? Let’s consider plate tectonics again! Many of the mountain chains we see are along subduction plate boundaries. When Plate A pushes against Plate B it subducts, or goes under, thus pushing up the sediment of Plate B and creating mountains. That’s a bit simplistic, but you get the idea. So when you keep pushing up fossils higher and higher above their original level, you get fossils… in a mountain! Wow!
Last on the list for this argument are the concerns over fossilized trees that are at “odd” angles and saved in several sedimentary layers. These are generally called “polystrate fossils” if you’d like to look it up yourself. Well, apparently this is superior evidence for a cataclysmic flood. Explain this away, science! Well, alright. I will! Although these fossils do suggest rapid accumulation of sediments around them, there is no need to even consider that it had to be a global flood. The breaking of a dam, flooded rivers, mudslides, even volcano eruptions can all contribute to a quick movement of sediment. One of the coolest (in my opinion) ways that this could happen is via volcano. A volcano (often one created over an oceanic plate) erupts water, along with molten rock and gas. The mixing of these materials can create lahars – or very hot mudslides – that can cover a lot of ground in a small amount of time. This is the case with Yellowstone’s polystrate forest. Voila!
Flood Arguments #2 and on…
According to allaboutcreation.org there is innumerable evidence for a biblical flood. Now, they don’t go into detail on these arguments (I’d have to buy the book and I’m definitely not going to), but I still find them incredibly humorous. Here are a few of my favorites:
– Earthquakes, Ice Age, The Grand Canyon, Frozen Mammoths, Volcanoes and Lava, Geothermal Heat, Magnetic Variations on the Ocean Floor, Changing Axis Tilt.
Changing Axis Tilt? A FLOOD would change the axis of the Earth? HA! Oh, it would be soooo funny if it weren’t so sad.
Last on my debunk list is against the ability for a worldwide flood to even happen due to the amount of water itself. According to biblical stories, the flood happened due to an epic rainfall and the erupting of underwater fountains. So, essentially, the flood was all made possible by groundwater and atmospheric moisture. Would you be interested in knowing that groundwater only makes up about 0.62% of the water on Earth? Even more devastating to a flood claim is the fact that the water content in the atmosphere is at about 0.001%. And, even if the glaciers all melted that would still be only an extra 2.15% of water. How could an extra 2.771% cover the continents entirely? They couldn’t. Never. I’ve debated this particular argument several times and it always gets a creationist to rely on the “god did it” answer. What I’m continually frustrated with is why a creationist would try to use science to explain a flood into existence – then backtrack when it is clear that science never could. It’s just a very sleazy thing to do… and they say that we’re the evil ones! Hmmph!
On a final note, I’d like to offer the photographic evidence of Noah’s Ark found. Okay, not really… but the image itself is quite funny-looking, to me anyway.
Now, I ask you – does that not look like a huge vagina?
Rachel Maddow had this clip on her show yesterday evening and I can say I haven’t laughed this hard in a LONG time. I know, I know… I should be focusing on more serious topics, but this really has to be shared.
Rather than fit all of this into my previous post about the research released today regarding “Ardi,” or Ardipithecus ramidus, I figure I’ll make a brand new one – because this is very special. The information has only been official for about a day and already the sheeple are at it. Like I mentioned in the post prior, there are several websites (at least) now saying that some source (who probably isn’t even qualified to wipe my ass) believes Ardi is showing ape came from man and not the other way around. If you’re reading this then chances are you’re like me and would find this quite hilarious if it weren’t so sad. What is the most depressing, albeit not shocking, are posts from average Americans on a website named ‘Rapture Ready.’
I don’t expect any religious group to completely agree with our theory of evolution as it does pose quite the conflict in their own minds… but they’re turning researched and studied information into a ‘god did it’ answer and, I’m sorry, but that pisses me off. Here are just some of the posts I happened to find the most humorous and feel quite ashamed to be of the same species as these mentally-incapacitated authors.
I wonder when this will turn out to be false, just like all the other so-called “proof”
What fossils have been renounced as unfit for relation to homo sapiens? I don’t recall any – nor can I find anything scientifically claiming this. Not that it would even matter, but having an ape-top and human-bottomed fossil still would not convince these people…
You are so right, and it’s a shame that people don’t see through the lies, even when they are proven false.
Hey! He read my mind… I bet his god told him what I was thinking… I burn many a calorie whenever I hear a theist utter the word ‘proof.’
I didn’t read the article, but if the skeleton is the one AOL had posted on its news page, I can tell you already that it looked more ape than human. But, you’re right, Glory, the news media will never report the truth that it was yet another evolutionary lie.
He didn’t even read the article! Well what a fucking shocker. If anything shows how ridiculous his beliefs are – it’s that he didn’t even take the time to find out for himself. Fucking amazing.
This is front page of Yahoo too. It looks like nothing more than a very old gorilla. Perhaps a type that when extinct centuries ago. Do these scientists ever think of that? We are still finding new species never before discovered every day. New fish, new birds, new insects, and then this, its just a never before seen by us gorilla.
I wonder if this person has realized that he is essentially claiming evolutionary work here. Nah, probably not.
Nearly 17 years after plucking the fossilized TOOTH of a new human ancestor from a pebbly desert in Ethiopia, an international team of scientists today (Thursday, Oct. 1) announced their reconstruction of a partial skeleton of the hominid, Ardipithecus ramidus, which they say revolutionizes our understanding of the earliest phase of human evolution.
So…it is all based on a tooth they found?
Dude.. can he read? It says right there that they reconstructed a ‘partial skeleton of the hominid.’ Partial does not mean one goddamn tooth! Hell.. if he bothered to look it up – he’d know that the skeleton has been studied using 125 pieces! No, fuckwad, it is not based on a tooth they found.. they found the fucking tooth first and kept digging for more!
Maybe the problem your having is that you’re trying to fit God into what you know about “science”. Maybe that’s the wrong way. Maybe instead you should try to fit science into what you know about God. Don’t start from the proposition that everything you learned in science class was correct, and then try to make God fit into that picture. Instead, start from the position that everything in the bible is true, and then try to see how science fits in with that. If it doesn’t fit, it’s the current world’s view that’s wrong, not the bible.
This is, by far, my favorite post yet. Yes, it is dumbfuckery at it’s best – but the keyword I noticed throughout is his nonstop usage of try. Not, “Oh well you can absolutely, without a doubt, fit science into the bible..” He’s just saying you should try… because, guess what, you cannot fit science into the bible at all. There IS no science in the bible. Oh, that flat Earth thing was scientific at the time, right guys? I also love the fact that if science can’t fit in with their dusty old book – it’s the world that has the view wrong… well there are more people in the world than Christians, so how does that work? Actually, don’t answer that – I probably don’t even want to hear it.
So, when you hear all this talk of “missing link” and see false reporting on our precious Ardi, be sure to curse… loudly. And then correct the sons of bitches. I hope Dawkins, or some other notable atheist/scientist, slams this shit into the ground…
I was reading Orac’s blog today and he had posted something that I feel needs more attention: vaccinations. I’ve always been wary of the supposed links between vaccines and childhood illnesses as a supposed result, but these videos make it quite clear that the claims are baseless. In watching them I was immediately reminded of the correlation doesn’t equal causation argument posed awhile back regarding pirates and global warming. Ironically enough, this is also mentioned in the video.
So, if we apply the same thought of vaccination = autism then global warming certainly might just be causing the dramatic reduction in pirate population. Polly’s going to need a new master….
The videos here aren’t trying to prove or disprove anything, merely show you the facts that are out there about vaccinations so you can make an informed decision about whether or not you, and/or your children, should go and get them. My opinion is that the risks of contracting the flu FAR outweigh the consequences, if any, of preparing your body to fight against them. But, take a look for yourselves…
Score another point for science and evolution. Actually, make that a hundred points… that’s how important this is. Some of you might be familiar with “Lucy,” the oldest remains of a human ancestor ever found that dates back to over 3 million years ago. Well, in 1994, scientists came across yet another skeleton and for the past 17 years they’ve been researching “Ardi,” or Ardipithecus. Ardi, like Lucy, is female and also lived in the area in and around today’s Ethiopia. Her skeleton is the oldest known hominid ever found – nearly 4.4 million years old.
What’s a hominid? Good question. According to the most reliable source in the world, Wikipedia (heh):
A hominid is any member of the biological family Hominidae (the “great apes”), including the extinct and extant humans, chimpanzees, gorillas, and orangutans. This classification has been revised several times in the last few decades. These various revisions have led to a varied use of the word “hominid”: the original meaning of Hominidae referred only to the modern meaning of Hominina, i.e. only humans and their closest relatives.
So, basically, Ardi is a very distant ancestor… of us! Or at least an extremely close relative. According to researchers, Ardi was about 4 feet tall and 110 pounds (more than some of us that are nearly a foot taller). Walked upright? Check. Opposable thumbs? Double check. Her toes were, too! She also had a variety of teeth meaning she was most likely omnivorous. Like us? Check.
Okay, so what’s the most important aspect of all of this work done? It is science working at it’s best. Nothing is ever 100% certain and this proves just how the scientific method works. Studies upon studies upon studies have been stating that our earliest ancestor was around 3-4 million or so years ago. Well now…
“In fact, what Ardipithecus tells us is that we as humans have been evolving to what we are today for at least 6 million years,” says C. Owen Lovejoy, an evolutionary biologist at Kent State University.
And tomorrow, Friday, we’ll all get to hear more about this exciting revelation. What? Don’t like that word? Hey, it’s tainted but it still works!
Edit: Much more information is out now out and about, but there’s one issue that concerns me. There are claims circulating that perhaps man was first and then the apes and chimps descended out of them. Yes, see for yourselves. Direct from their article:
Man didn’t descend from apes. What is closer to the truth is that our knuckle-dragging cousins descended from us.
and also this little gem:
(Ardi) is descended from the “missing link,” or the last common ancestor between humans and apes.
Now, I’m not saying that it isn’t possible that some scientists might be suggesting this… it’s just pretty ridiculous for me to believe. Maybe these so-called scientists are the same kind that like to wear tinfoil hats? Do they not know the basics of evolution/natural selection at all?! Nature alters these organisms and if they survive and reproduce, they will generally continue to do so until stopped. Just because Ardi is more “human-like” to some people doesn’t mean she is more closely related to us. And if I hear the “missing link” one more time I’m going to throw a fucking crocoduck in someone’s face. Where the hell are these people getting their degrees from?!